I don’t speak to my father. Like ever. Some people know this and know the situation, and now a lot more of you will know, but essentially, he is pushing all of his family members and friends away, including me. Just for the record- the last time I actually spoke to him face to face with it being civil was at my great uncle’s funeral 3 or 4 years ago. Then the last time he ‘got in touch with me,’ I ended up having to change my phone number because he was harassing me (at the biggest swim meet of the year at the time) and then we went to court. Not good. That’s all background info. Anyway, including myself, my father has also pushed out his brothers and sister and their extended family (his nieces and nephews, cousins, brother and sisters-in-law, etc, etc, and even his parents before they both passed away. EVERYONE). Basically all he has left is his wife, her family and my brother. I’ve been praying almost every day that he would come to know the Lord, accept Him into his heart, truly see what he’s done, repent and try to make amends. It sounds horrible, I know, but there really is a lot of anger, hurt, and demons surrounding his life. It makes me upset to think about and that if he continues on this way, that he will not go to Heaven. However, even though my father’s side of the family doesn’t talk to my father (and subsequently me and my brother because there was a huge fight almost 10 years ago now and my father cut all of them out of our lives- we were 15 and 11 and had really no choice in the matter. I basically lost my entire family on my father’s side) they still talk to each other! Okay so fast forwarding. I haven’t heard from some of my aunts, uncles and cousins in years. Like almost 10 years. I’m thinking that most of the blame belongs to my father, because he really is that broken that he is pushing everyone away (I know that sounds awful), however I could have reached out to them sooner and they could have to us. But better late than never, right? So I started praying about it and asking God how to approach this situation. I was nervous pretty much this whole 10 years time that since they all whatever with my father so many years ago, they’d be mad at me as a result or not want to get to know me or my brother again because of that and that we’d still be in this estranged relationship for all of forever and they associated us with whatever happened (stupid, I know). So about a week ago I found two of my aunts and one of my cousins on fb (I couldn’t find my other family members) and added them after a lot of internal freaking out that they would not reciprocate my reaching out to them, but I did it because I knew that was going to be the only way to get them back into my life. My aunt and cousin accepted and my other aunt has not responded yet! My aunt (who is my father’s sister) sent me a really long message and ended it by saying that it was great to hear from me and that we should stay in touch. I read that the other morning and completely broke down, and my cousin (who is this aunt’s son) also said that we should keep in touch. It seems such a trivial thing to add your family on fb, but this is such a big deal to me because I want my extended family to get back together (my relationship with my father is a different story). They weren’t at my hs graduation or any of my swim meets growing up, and I want them (if possible) to be at my college graduation next May and at my wedding if I ever get there. I want them all back in my life! God gave me the courage to reach out, and put it in their hearts to accept me (and my brother) back into their lives. I know it may take some time for all of us to get to know each other again, but God is so good!
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AWESOME! thanks for the submission, kylesue. We at G2G and hopefully the tumblr community will be keeping your situation in prayer for sure! It is so sweet to know that when we ask our Heavenly Father for things like that, He hears them and I’m sure he wants the same for your family as well!
FACT: “What father among you, if his son asks for a fish, will instead of a fish give him a serpent; 12 or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? 13 If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” (From Luke chapter 11).
It is so reassuring to remember this fact, that our Father in Heaven is completely perfect in every way, and if we ask we shall receive. Ask daily for more of the Holy Spirit in your life to give you courage to step up and be intentional with those relationships with your family. Pray for the Holy Spirit to show your father and extended family members the unconditional perfect LOVE that only comes from Jesus and what he did for us. Praise God for what he is already doing in your life!
submit what God is doing in your life
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